My boyfriend (27 years old) and I (23 years old) have beem together for a year and a hafl and jist recently we were talking about moving in together. (He lives with his dad and I live with my mom. I used to live alone and moved back with my mom. He has never lived alone.) The next day he asks me if I would live with his dad and, of course, I said no because we wouldn’t have any privacy and I would feel very uncomfortable at my own house. But he tried to guilt trip me saying that I didn’t like his dad. I would never make him live with my mom or make him feel bad for not wanting to.
After I said no, he told me that he was going to stay with his dad because it was complicated. I asked him why and he told me that if he moves in with me he would feel like he’s abandoning his dad. So, for me, he basically told me that he will never have anything serious with me because of his dad. I will never make him choose between his family and I and I feel very hurt. I feel it is pointless for us to stay together if this relationship isn’t going anywhere.
I don’t want to marry or have kids and I really don’t know if we should move in together but, eventually, these are things I wanted with him. He always talks about moving in together, getting married, and having kids, and staying with me forever but at this point I feel like he’s just all talk that he wasn’t planning on doing all that with me. It hurts and I don’t know what to tell him and how to tell him.